did i ever tell you about the time i was really stoned and watching flight of the phoenix in the dark? to this day i have to stop and think about that movie and wonder whether or not it was just a movie or if it really happened. i don’t like watching movies when i’m stoned because they seem too real to me. too vivid. i always feel like i’m right there, in it.

so i was watching this movie and i was baked and i kept thinking, ‘jesus man. i’ve got to get out of this desert!’ and i kept thinking dennis quaid was a jerk and hoping like hell giovanni ribisi knew what he was talking about. i also thought about ribisi being in that movie the gift by sam raimi. but it was weird cause i knew that was a movie. i just kept going, ‘that guy. that guy trying to build the plane…he was in that creepy movie! the one where cate blanchett was a psychic.’ whoa. that movie was inky.

then i’d sit back on the couch and wait for the desert to envelop me. wait to die of thirst. because they’re never coming for us, man. they’ve forgotten all about us.

so it’s not a good idea for me to watch movies when stoned out of my gourd. although it does tend to make shit movies better for the viewing.