Yeah. Okay, here’s what I don’t get about Law & Order or other cop shows of their ilk. The cops go and question people and they’re all like, “Blah blahblah, tell us what you know!” and the people they’re questioning are always like, “Blah blah blah. Blah.”
RUDE!
and they don’t even stop what they’re doing. Ever. They act like the cops are UPS delivery men in their way so they just step around them while they talk; they keep right on working, keep right on walking, moving, unpacking boxes, mowing lawns, packing getaway bags — whatever.
Me? If a cop walks up to me with questions about a murder I’m all ears. He’s got all my attention. I’ll sit in his lap, lock my arms around his neck and never let our eyes lose contact. Such is my devotion to proving my innocence in this and all future possible crimes.
Plus? They tell the cops to leave! Can you even do that? Maybe it’s cause I have an unhealthy fear of authority but I didn’t know you could do that. I was watching an episode today and this lady was being questioned about a murder and one of the cops was all like, “Blah blah blah something incendiary.”
And the woman was all like “Hhnnh! What? You can’t talk to me like that. I’m all indignant now and I’m just going to demand that you leave.”
And they left!
What?? What about the murder? Uh, did you forget something, guys? So, what? They’re just all like, “Oh, we’re sorry. We know you probably killed that guy and chopped him up and put him in the freezer to feed your pigs in small doses over the course of the next year, but we were waaaaaay out of line to insinuate that you might be a slut, preying on men, their bank accounts and their meaty haunches. We’ll just be going now. No, no, don’t get up. We’ll show ourselves out.”
Oh. Your. God. I don’t get it so much. I thought television was just like real life. Otherwise, why are there so many reality shows?
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5 Responses to Book ‘em, Danno. (or you know, if it’s okay with ‘em that is.)
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A Woman's Manifesto
Because a woman’s work is never done.
and is underpaid, or unpaid, or boring, or repetitious,
and we’re the first to get fired,
and what we look like is more important than what we do.
And if we get raped its our fault
and if we get beaten we must have provoked it
and if we raise our voices we’re nagging bitches
and if we enjoy sex we’re nymphos
and if we don’t we’re frigid
and if we love women it’s because we can’t get a real man
and if we ask our doctor too many questions we’re neurotic or pushy
and if we expect childcare we’re selfish
and if we stand up for our rights we’re aggressive and un-feminine
and if we don’t we’re typical weak females
and if we want to get married we’re out to trap a man
and if we don’t we’re unnatural
and because we still can’t get an adequate, safe contraceptive, but men can walk on the moon
and if we can’t cope or don’t want a pregnancy we’re made to feel guilty about abortion
and for lots and lots of other reasons
we are part of the women’s liberation movement.- Joyce Stevens, International Woman’s Day, 1975.
Man Vs. Heart Attack
I am somewhat worried about the dude on Man v Food. He isn’t looking so good these days and putting that food away like that can’t be good for him.
I know, and also how on Law and Order: Criminal Intent the crime always involved the *most* titilating details. It is odd that I hesitate to tell you the example I am thinking of because children might ever read this blog, since as far as I know that show is on during prime time. But suffice it to say, it was ten kinds of wrong and fifteen kinds of sexy. I don’t even think those two get called in unless the victim is shown to have had sex with at least 2 different men inside of 48 hours of the crime. I wish they would get a clue from possibly the best crime drama ever, “Without a Trace”. Now that is a classy show. If that show could just get David Caruso to leave CSI: Miami and star on that one, hoo boy and Katie bar the door!
M@
You’re such a dork. “Without a Trace” is like watching paint dry. A boring color paint on a boring wall with horrible actors lined up against it.
And fifteen kinds of sexy? Double You Tea Eff??
Should I make out my will now?
I noticed that they now ask the cops (and the FBI) to leave. it must be easy to investigate crime because the one who did it always says “I want my lawyer” before asking them to leave.
I might become a private detective.
I like how they can go to a burned down house or bar, find one small cigarette and find the murderers dna all over it, and thats all they need to solve the case, but it takes one hour to get it to the right suspect.
Anji, you and me both. PIs don’t have to travel for their work, do they?
Mom, me too. I was wondering the same thing not so long ago. Also? I don’t get why, without fail, they always “finger the perp” early in the show and it’s obvious to everybody and God that they got the wrong guy — but it’s still going to take them most of the hour to get their heads out of their butt to start looking for the *real* criminal. Way to waste time.