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tonight was the event of our annual office christmas party. i don’t technically know if i’m allowed to call it a christmas party still. we looked warily at one another and said, “happy chr-holi-chri-kwanz-…i’m going to go with holiday! happy holidays!” and then the other person let out a sigh of relief. happy the decision [...]
so since i’ve been back the boys and i are catching up with a mad boardgame playing jag. monopoly? i’m holding my own but they own all the big dollar properties WITH hotels. we’re going on day three of this one. we have to leave it set up on the card table and take breaks [...]
isn’t kirsten dunst and orlando bloom of elizabethtown just the freakin’ cutest, quirkiest little couple in the world? couldn’t you just scoop them up and hug them both? aren’t they the most adorable? let’s kill them! since it was my idea i get the heart and the spleen in a jar. okay, hey, while you [...]
friday’s party was loads of fun. it took me all day saturday to recover. the boys had fun too. there were tons of other kids there for them to hang out with. and let me tell you, the booze was really flowing. this poor kid could not hold her liquor. but she wasn’t about to [...]
hooray for county fair time! all the carnies and greasy food you can shake a stick at. we spent the entire day at the northwest washington county fair and let me tell you, this is a true sign of a good time: we saw the animals, rode all the rides, ate all the greasy food, [...]
matt and i took the boys to the pacific science center in seattle for a day trip. the place is huge and there’s just a lil bit too much to do there in one day. though it weren’t for a lack of trying. the butterfly exhibit was beautiful. all the hands on stuff was groovy. [...]
i like funny. i especially like funny people. i tend to surround myself with them. i love to laugh so it’s natural that i would surround myself with people who make me laugh till i pee my panties in a fit. or, you know, something like that. what i don’t love is people who are [...]
so tonight i took the boys swimming. i bought them some floaties for the pool. fortunately i’m full of hot air and was able to blow them all up manually, since i lack a compressor and the proper tools for doing it up right. and i’m good with my mouth. so that’s alright. so this [...]
Me: i’m all-aglow with anticipation! Matt: oh good! that’s much better than aglow with radiation! Me: isn’t it though? although — i could then possibly join the justice league or the league of extraordinary gentlemen. of which, there are most certainly women. don’t you doubt that for a minute. Matt: hm thats true. or the…x-men [...]
what i’m sayin’ is, it’s a damn wonder we didn’t blow anything up. that’s all. i mean, besides the obvious. besides the stuff we MEANT to blow up. it’s a damn wonder and a miracle to me no one lost a limb or put out an eye is what i’m saying. but it’s not for [...]
A Woman's Manifesto
Because a woman’s work is never done.
and is underpaid, or unpaid, or boring, or repetitious,
and we’re the first to get fired,
and what we look like is more important than what we do.
And if we get raped its our fault
and if we get beaten we must have provoked it
and if we raise our voices we’re nagging bitches
and if we enjoy sex we’re nymphos
and if we don’t we’re frigid
and if we love women it’s because we can’t get a real man
and if we ask our doctor too many questions we’re neurotic or pushy
and if we expect childcare we’re selfish
and if we stand up for our rights we’re aggressive and un-feminine
and if we don’t we’re typical weak females
and if we want to get married we’re out to trap a man
and if we don’t we’re unnatural
and because we still can’t get an adequate, safe contraceptive, but men can walk on the moon
and if we can’t cope or don’t want a pregnancy we’re made to feel guilty about abortion
and for lots and lots of other reasons
we are part of the women’s liberation movement.- Joyce Stevens, International Woman’s Day, 1975.
Man Vs. Heart Attack
I am somewhat worried about the dude on Man v Food. He isn’t looking so good these days and putting that food away like that can’t be good for him.
