Currently viewing the category:
"
"
"
This morning I woke up twice. I first woke up to Matt getting dressed and letting the dogs out. He does this quietly. About as quietly as a hippo all hopped up on meth goes running through a china shop. In the deadening silence I fell back into my strange, beautifully frightening dream in which [...]
I took a little break from answering complimentary emails about my new shoes to sign in here and report the latest news about my brakes. The car has over 76,000 miles on it and the front brake pads are down to 20-25% and the rears are still at 70%. Yes, the SAME brakes that came [...]
Matt has this friend, right? Listen to this. When my mom was like nine, she thought that clowns were born that way and she was scared that when she had kids they would be born clowns. Years after telling us this she now says that she was right all along and had three clowns. But [...]
Here is Matt’s answer to everything: “Maybe you have a fever.” As in, “I’m hot.” “Maybe you have a fever.” “I don’t feel so good.” “Maybe you have a fever.” “There’s a piranha swimming in the bathtub.” “Maybe you have a fever.” I’m afraid Hillary Clinton might be the next president. “OH GOD, NO! Maybe [...]
Matt is a caring, giving boyfriend. For instance, last night we were in bed talking about things, as couples do. The conversation started to get racy and then it leads to the mention of a threesome. Of course, don’t freak out. It was one of those conversations that’s just a “whatif” kind of thing. You [...]
This right here, what I’m about to tell you? This is the fundamental difference between me and Matt. We do this thing, right? Only everybody else in the free world is doing it. We stumble. That is, we use the web service called StumbleUpon. If you’ve never tried it, give it a shot. That is, [...]
Well…at least it’s a link, right? I have to agree though that this blog is quite interesting. But I didn’t come here and take over a post’s worth of Amisha’s blog just to send you to the google translation of someone in some other country linking here in another language (The untranslated page is quite [...]
Matt & I watched We Are Marshall, right? We rented it like, 3 years ago and I think it might be due back tomorrow or something so we decided we should probably get around to watching it tonight. Phew wee! Something died and crawled in my dvd player. I mean, don’t get me wrong. I’m [...]
About this asinine piece of evidence marking our further descent into hell, Matt says, “Let’s also make him enviro-friendly and have him eschew wrapping paper. Also, having reindeer is cruel and slave labor of elves is probably out now.” I couldn’t possibly agree more.
We discussed, you’ll recall, my devastating breakup with my therapist earlier this year. Well — I discussed it and you sat patiently — such good sports that you are. No, I’m still not over him. Time has not healed any wounds whatsoever. I know what “they’ all say and “they” are all liars. Nonetheless, today, [...]
A Woman's Manifesto
Because a woman’s work is never done.
and is underpaid, or unpaid, or boring, or repetitious,
and we’re the first to get fired,
and what we look like is more important than what we do.
And if we get raped its our fault
and if we get beaten we must have provoked it
and if we raise our voices we’re nagging bitches
and if we enjoy sex we’re nymphos
and if we don’t we’re frigid
and if we love women it’s because we can’t get a real man
and if we ask our doctor too many questions we’re neurotic or pushy
and if we expect childcare we’re selfish
and if we stand up for our rights we’re aggressive and un-feminine
and if we don’t we’re typical weak females
and if we want to get married we’re out to trap a man
and if we don’t we’re unnatural
and because we still can’t get an adequate, safe contraceptive, but men can walk on the moon
and if we can’t cope or don’t want a pregnancy we’re made to feel guilty about abortion
and for lots and lots of other reasons
we are part of the women’s liberation movement.- Joyce Stevens, International Woman’s Day, 1975.
Man Vs. Heart Attack
I am somewhat worried about the dude on Man v Food. He isn’t looking so good these days and putting that food away like that can’t be good for him.
